I occasionally write about things that I wouldn't want real life people reading.
Those things are friend-locked.
I have no shame.
- Music:Jason Mraz - Bella Luna
you should take your laundry out of the dryers when it's done! especially if you are using the only three dryers in a small community laundry room! rude person, i will return to the laundry room in ten minutes and if your laundry is still there I am putting it on the floor! i've given you more than enough time for you to come collect it!
I went for my follow-up to my periodontist today and came out with stitches. Weird man! He asked me what I thought and I said I'd like the gum to have been brought down a bit more, but I didn't care about the placement of that tooth because I didn't want braces again. He was a bit concerned with the placement because it's 1mm out of synch or something like that but they are all healthy and the surgery did it's job, etc. But really it would be nice to have had that gum brought down lower, and he said, 'what are you doing the rest of the day?' I said I had a tax appointment at 3. He said, 'oh you'll be fine by then!' And before I knew it I was in that chair again and he was cutting open my gum again so he brought it down. It's perfect! But it might not stay that way because at this point it's just trying to grown gum over enamel which isn't natural but it might take and then this 10 year process will be over and my mouth will be perfect!
It's nice having a day off! It's weird being a business professional! Inside I still feel like a student. It's hard to shake the habit of 16 years of a school life. But I guess things are okay!
- Tags:teeth, work
- Music:YUI - Thank you my teens
For work, I've had to do some research on sustainable agriculture and the like, including Eric Schlosser and his Fast Food nation book so I've read some excerpts and am disconcerted... for two reasons...
1. the obvious, is nothing real? Why is everything flavoured? etc. and 2. I'm mostly concerned by how unconcerned I am. The entire piece of why McDonald's french fries are so delicious (very precise use of chemicals and un-french-fry french fry flavouring I just really wanted some french fries from McDonalds! I think, "hey, it's all in the name of progress! We can make tastes tastier so why not?" But then I also think, "hey, I wish I was a subsistence farmer or Amish or at least a little more in touch with the true nature of all things."
Oh well. In the end, I think I'll have to eat some McDonald's this weekend. Or Chick fil a. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Chick fil a.
Your rainbow is strongly shaded white and brown.
What is says about you: You are a deep thinking person. You appreciate quiet moments. You feel closer to people when you understand their imperfections. People depend on you to make them feel secure.Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.
Yep people are lost without me.
I find that the biggest problem is looking ahead. And trying to plan ahead, but mostly just looking ahead - or the lack thereof to be more accurate.
It's really difficult to think seriously and understand the impact of small things and how over time the result is bad, and usually at that point irreversible.
If you leave the house and realize you forgot to turn the kitchen light off, it really doesn't seem to matter much. But how many millions of people forget and leave a light on for a couple hours at a time on any given day? How much energy is wasted everyday? And it seems so insignificant! But our planet is shifting dramatically and soon, if we still have backyards that aren't submerged under water, we may have polar bears milling about, as common as house cats.
But I think that this has a lot to do with not just me, and not just you but everybody. If I was the only person in the world leaving my light on while I pop out for some dinner, then I think it would be okay but there are a lot of people in the world and what I do, and what you do and what half a billion other people do all is relevant to me and you and everyone else in the world.
And so, too, do the things that we do to one another breed surprising consequences - or at least they could.
How different we all are! And how sensitive we are! And fragile! We all have things that are so important to us, and there are lots of things that make us so sad! And what makes me feel like crying may not make you feel like crying, and what makes you so sad may make me feel okay. And how can anyone know unless we know one another well? And how many people can you know well? I think not many! If I say something in passing, standing in line at Starbucks and it is seemingly harmless and I think I am so funny sometimes, but what if what I say hurts the person behind me? I do not know how other people feel and so I cannot pretend to make up an example and so I will have to use my own.
Sometimes I feel really sad, and as though I've had some sort of falling out with the rest of the world. I think - I am so different! I do not think that I should be here! I think that there is something wrong with me that makes me feel so different and so uncomfortable! I think that everybody is really horrible and really cruel and tragic.
In those times I feel really like giving up and going home, sitting on the couch and going to sleep forever. And then I'll be standing on the platform waiting for the Metro and I'll overhear someone say something awful about someone who is just passing by - someone they don't even know! Or I'll be with coworkers and one will say something mean about someone who they act nice to and then I know that their kindness to that person is fake. (And that person still thinks that that other person likes them but they don't and that is really sad!)
So anyway, in those times, when I had already felt really sad, I feel even worse. But they don't know that! How can they? I don't think that they should at all! But they should be careful of what they say! I don't think that it is a matter such as, "oh, what if someone overhears something sad and that is the moment they decide to give up and they kill themselves and that person was the one that had the cure to the common cold and now we will always have the sniffles in the winter because that person at the train station said something mean that they overheard."
I think that it does not have to be a matter such as that. I think that it is enough to say, "sometimes people make others sad without meaning to." I think that that is enough to want to be just a little better. To think that if I am a little more careful with my words, and if I try to think ahead just a little, that if I think, "I want to be mean to this person because she made me mad, but if I did that she would feel bad and, really, what did that accomplish at all?" Because maybe that person in turn will make someone else feel bad -- maybe me in retaliation and it will be a bad cycle.
But I think that it is also good to mention that on the other side of this, by being careful to not make others sad, then don't I make them happy? Or, at least, I can try to. And since we are all so closely connected, then I think that this is very important.
I think that I will try to think more carefully about how I act, and although it feels good to be mean to someone who made me mad, I think that I will try to keep from doing that and instead try to be nicer.
That is what I will try to do.
Pretty busy at work today. I need to update my resume since I haven't since starting my job at the Embassy. Although I think now it will look like all I am qualified for is to be a PA or Event Coordinator, two careers I don't fancy.
I am re-re-re-re-re(x?)watching Buffy, just finished season two, the ending of which is so beautiful!
I need to have my car inspection this month, am planning to do it Thursday and hope it doesn't turn out like my "I'm going to the dry cleaner's this week!" and never go.
I bought a bicycle and am intent on cycling into work. My first ride I went 11 miles so I should be able to do it, but I want to train a bit more before I finally do it. It's getting really cold in the mornings now...
One of these days I am going to take a sick day and go to the eye doctor. I think my coworkers think I'm either a drug-addict or I spend my lunches crying in the bathroom otherwise how can my eyes be so red all the time? I wonder what is wrong with me?
Work is hard and I'm not doing very well. I have made more than a couple not very small mistakes. I keep hoping that it is because my immediate supervisor, the one that is supposed to train me is on vacation. It's sort of stupid to bring in a new employee and shove a ton of work on them and expect them to know how to do everything even if the person who should be showing them how to do it, or at the very least, be there to answer any questions, is not there at all. And is it just me or are the British always on vacation?
I shouldn't complain since I'll be taking a week vacation too. I wonder if I have even LJed about that. I don't LJ at all anymore, I guess. I don't really get online, I guess. My new commute is horrible. Public transit was fun the first few days but now it's just really tiring and uncomfortable. I don't like when my body is pressed up against everybody else's bodies on the train.
Sarah crashed my car yesterday. Yay!
I have almost completed my DVD collection of Frasier. Yay!
Have started a new manga series. Yay!
I sort of can't wait for my trip to Japan next month. And by sort-of I mean I'm too stressed out about everything else in my life to be thinking about it.